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Saturday, October 10, 2015

Our New Journey: Surrogacy Part 1- How it all began

It is very early in our journey, but after thinking about it a lot I have decided that I would like as much support and help from step one. That being said I am going to share this road with my friends and family now!
 
 I have always felt a strong compassion for surrogacy, and thought that it would be something I may like to do at some point in my life. A situation to be a surrogate for a couple we know came up early in our marriage, but seeing we were not done having our own kids it was put on a back burner with other things I may want to do in this life.
Then last year when I was 9 weeks pregnant with James I went with my best friend Sara to her transfer (which is the term used in the surrogacy world for getting pregnant with the "intended parents" baby). I met her intended parents, and fell in love with them! It was so fun being pregnant with my best friend. The best part was being their when she gave birth, and gave the most amazing gift to the kindest couple of a lovely baby girl!
Mike came to the hospital that evening after work, and met the parents. He saw their tears of joy, and was in awe of this gift Sara had given! Soon after that we started talking about how this is something we would like to do for another couple.

It was February of this year that I started thinking and praying about it more. I brought this to Mike's attention, and he started doing the same. In March he found out a good friend and mentor's wife was also a surrogate. This helped him get some of the questions he had answered about being the husband and support person for a surrogate. They even took us to dinner one night to share their journey with us. It was truly inspiring, and I will always be thankful for them.

 I talked to my mom to have her praying, and filled out an application with Rocky Mountain Surrogacy (RMS) to just find out if I qualified. I figured knowing I did or didn't would help with the next steps.

I did, so it was time to make some decisions about what we wanted from this journey. Michael and I decided that we would be giving this baby a year of our lives, but care about it forever. We wanted the parents of this baby to people we would never question giving a baby to, and people who held the same moral standards we do.

  • Because we believe a baby is a human from the moment it is conceived (even if done in a lab) we would not be willing to terminate for any reason. 
  • We wanted parents who wanted a baby so much that there was not genetic testing needed, because nothing would make them love this (these) baby(ies) less. 
  • We wanted a married couple that has a strong relationship. Michael and I strongly believe that you have to love your spouse more than your kids to show your kids how to have good relationships. 
  • And we wanted a couple that was Christian. Denomination didn't matter to us as much as knowing the baby(ies) would be raised to love Jesus. 
I felt like all of these things for me would make the gift so much easier to give in the end, and would give the intended parents and us more common ground to build a friendship on during the process. 

All of the surrogates that we know needed to meet multiple couples to find one that fit, so that is what I was prepared to do. 
Then on May 18th I received an email with our 1st "match" (Like E-harmony for surros RMS has a great questionnaire, so they can get Intended Parents that match the wants/ needs of the Surro and vice versa). I started tearing up while reading their bio, and knew they were the ones for us. I sent it to Mike who said the same thing, and then had RMS set up a time for us to meet over Skype. 
They were so wonderful to talk to, and all of my nerves just calmed as I could just tell these people would be my friends very soon!
Now that I have had the opportunity to get to know them I just know that the peace was from God, and these people are the reason I found myself wanting to be a surrogate!
❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️




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