Our New Journey: Surrogacy Part 3 - Questions Answered!

Since I started sharing with people that I am a Surro I have had lots of fun reactions and conversations. I also get a lot of questions (that I do not mind at all), so I decided to answer some that I get a lot to help friends understand Surrogacy a little better!

1. Don't you think it will be hard to give away your baby?
This is not my baby. Really! In no way is this baby related to me.
 Have you ever had a child in your life that you love, but they are not yours? You watch them for a long time and care what happens to them, but you are perfectly aware they are not yours. That is how I see Surrogacy. This is extreme babysitting. I am taking care of a friends baby while she can't, but one day in June it will be time for the baby to go home. And guess who won't have to change any diapers ;)

2. Won't it be hard to "be good" with eating and such seeing it is not your child?
No more than it was pregnant with my own kids. Just like I wouldn't hand your baby a glass of wine I sure am not going to do that to this baby. I went into this knowing that there would be hard parts, but being "good" isn't a worry at all. 

3. Do you have to do shots?
Yep, and that was the part I feared the most. Which made is a nice surprise when it wasn't that bad at all. I explain the Medications a little in Our New Journey: Surrogacy Part 2
For the most part Mike gave me the shots, so that helps. The injection it's self doesn't even hurt. 
The 1st 2 days of Lupron I was sick to my stomach, but that's because I am super smart and was doubling my dosage... once fixed I had no other reaction. 
The Progesterone is the biggest, but now I can give it to myself (thanks to Sara for making me be a big girl when Mike deployed). It caused some back pain the 1st few days, and occasionally would sting a bit after injection. 
Other than that I had no problems or bad reactions! Thank you Jesus!

4. You are a saint for doing this... ok not a question, but I do have a response.
Nope, not really. It is something I felt called to do, and something I am excited to do. 
Yes, I think that being a parent is the greatest blessing. But it is not all selfless. My intended parents are making it possible for my family to have a financial buffer, so I can stay home with James until he starts school (at least). This is an amazing gift they are giving me! I loved working, but when James was born leaving him in daycare was not something Mike and I were willing to let happen. We planned ahead, and were financially ready for him... but this will give us flexibility when the unseen life things happen.

5. Will you do it again?
Not a clue ;) 
The meds? Yep I could? The transfer? Sure it was a breeze!
 But there is a lot to come, so ask me again in a year or so :)

6. Any questions about my Intended Parents.
Though I will say I love them, and can't wait to have their baby. I won't say much more. For the reason that "it is not my business to share".  The surrogacy part is my story, but this is their family's story! That is a lot bigger! 

7. What made you decide to do this?
That is kind of hard to answer to anyone who doesn't believe in God, because I really believe that he had it in store for my life. Every last detail right down to my intended parents.
Being a parent is the best gift in life, and I get to help God grow that gift for 2 amazing people!  

The owner of Rocky Mountain Surrogacy said that she was a Surro because 

Everyone deserves to hear "I love you, Mommy"

And that is reason enough for me :)

Our New Journey: Surrogacy Part 2- Getting baby making ready

Once I was matched with my intended parents (IPs) it was time to get the ball rolling.

• Rocky Mountain Surrogacy  (RMS) sent my medical records to my IP's clinic to get approved. 
• About 2 weeks later they gave us the "GO"! So I made an appointment with my new OBGYN to have my IUD out, and start oral birth control to get my cycle on a specific schedule. 
• While waiting my intended mother (IM) and I started getting to know each other via email!
• In early July Michael and I met with a psychologist for a psych eval. Which I was oddly way more nervous about than any other part. However it turns out I am not too crazy after all lol :) It was really not uncomfortable at all once we were there. It was just checking on our relationship, and support system. Then making sure we understood the details of surrogacy. 
• Then at the end of July I flew to Portland for the day to get a check up by the doctor who would be doing the transfer (putting my IP's baby in me). He did an ultrasound to make sure all my girl parts were in working order. 
• While in Portland I met  my Coordinator with the clinic to learn about all the medications I would be starting, and scheduled my Transfer!
• During the next few weeks I weaned James from nursing (which I had planned to do by his 1st birthday anyways, so it worked perfect)
• Then my lawyer looked over what we had for a contract, we all agreed, and it was signed within days.

• On August 17th I started Medications. 

1. Lupron (a small painless needle in the tummy once a day) to stop my hormone production. 
2. Prenatal Vitamins  
3. Baby Aspirin
4. An Antibiotic right before the transfer 
5. Del-Estrogen (a mid-sized needle in the side 2X a week) 
6. Progesterone (a huge needle in the side or bum each night) when the lupron stops to start hormone production on track to ovulate at the time of Transfer.  

•  While I took my meds like a good girl for a month we planned for the week of the transfer, and RMC booked the flights ect that I picked. 

And that is about it! 

July 30th - the transfer went by so quickly, 

and smoothly I can't believe it is all in the past!
Here is the Link to my Transfer Story

Our Princess Unicorn turned 9

Daddy's Girl is growing way too fast!

But she still would rather spend her time with him over anyone else which makes my heart so happy!

Daddy woke up early to make his girl a 9 shaped pancake, and her favorite eggs!

We filled the house with balloons that had notes to her, and even decorated the car and her bathroom mirror :)

That afternoon Dad went to lunch at her school, played with her and her friends at recess, and brought her class birthday snacks! 

After school we took the kids to get pumpkins at a local patch.

Then my family came over for dinner and carving fun!

 James thought the pumpkin guts were amazing!

The older kids not so much ;)

Even the newlyweds made it which made Jenna feel super special!

Seeing Jenna doesn't like cake much she wanted pumpkin cookies with her presents!

 The next night Daddy's future WNBA Rock star had her 1st Basketball practice

James had his 1st flying lesson ;) 

 Thursday Night was her school carnival 

I was helping run things, so she spent the evening with dad and her girlfriends. 

After her 1st game on Saturday we threw her a 

Costume Party

with all of her closest friends :)

 She didn't want a cake, so she had Vampire Doughnuts instead ;)

 The Prizes for Best, scariest, and cutest costumes 

And candy popcorn hands for favors!

 The 1st part of the party we had a Magician who had the kids laughing, and totally impressed!

Then he made them all balloon surprises ;)

 Everyone even daddy dressed for her party hahaha

Then we had a Jennabelle Carnival!

We had a pumpkin ring toss, Ghost bowling, Spider darts, and goblin eyeball throw for the kids to earn tickets for fun prizes!

(Thanks to Aunt Eva, Uncle Dave, Uncle Joshy, Auntie Grace, and Grandma April for running the games)

 The all time favorite fame was Bobbing for Apples much to my surprise!

All of the kids wanted to get an apple and we ended up going through 2 bags of them!

 Then while Jenna opened her gifts her friends ate their apples and doughnuts!

Then ran the sugar off in the back yard until their parents picked them up!

That night we had Jenna's favorite dinner while we had family movie night!

Then Sunday after church Grandma and Mandi brought lunch and presents for one last party!

Then the kids spent hours in the backyard with dad playing basketball :)

Which is how Jennabelle would spend every day if you let her pick!

I am so thankful for this sweet, fun, loving girl that God has blessed Michael and I with!

And thankful to everyone who helped us celebrate her birthday "week"!

Went away for our anniversary, and I came back knocked up

I got your attention didn't I?

Though it is early I have decided to start sharing our new journey. 

This is definitely not step one in the process, but more of an announcement. 

I will back track later for people wondering how we got here.

On Wednesday morning we flew to Portland, 

and rented a car. 

(Mike let me pick hahahah 

He was less entertained than I was!

Well until he got to drive it up windy mountain roads) 

And drove to the Beach!

I really love the ocean, and have a deep admiration for lighthouses, so we started with Cannon Beach.

Mike prefers hiking and mountains, so it was perfect because it had a little of each of us!

The Jacqui side of the Beach, and the Mike side ;)

Then we went to seaside 

I love the little town there, and especially the candy store!

Now for the good part!

Thursday Morning I finally got to meet my 

new favorite woman in the world! 

(In future posts she will go by IM as in intended mother)

We went to the best breakfast, and walked around Portland 

getting to know each other better.

And then we went to the hospital, so ....

I could get pregnant with her baby!

Best 1st date ever ;)

I truly know that I am meant to have a baby for this family!

 I can't imagine going through this with anyone else!

I stayed in bed the rest of the day and Friday during the day to
 make sure her sweet little one could "stick"!
As a busy mom this was the best way to spend 2 days off!
Mike and I watched movies, talked, and just rested more than I have got to since James was born!

My thoughtful friend left me the sweetest gifts ever before leaving...

No really... have you had Leonidas chocolate? It is like Magic!!!

And almost too pretty to eat, but I did ;)

 Late Friday Mike and I went for a walk to see the boats (which I love), and eat our anniversary dinner!

Saturday we flew home to cuddle our babies!

4 days is still a long time even when having fun to be without our youngest!

A week later we got the word (after a blood test) that it took for sure 

and their little pumpkin is growing!

Today I am 5 weeks and 1 days pregnant. 

Let the Extreme Babysitting Begin!

Here is the link to 

Part 1

Of our surrogacy process 

Our New Journey: Surrogacy Part 1- How it all began

It is very early in our journey, but after thinking about it a lot I have decided that I would like as much support and help from step one. That being said I am going to share this road with my friends and family now!

 

 I have always felt a strong compassion for surrogacy, and thought that it would be something I may like to do at some point in my life. A situation to be a surrogate for a couple we know came up early in our marriage, but seeing we were not done having our own kids it was put on a back burner with other things I may want to do in this life.

Then last year when I was 9 weeks pregnant with James I went with my best friend Sara to her transfer (which is the term used in the surrogacy world for getting pregnant with the "intended parents" baby). I met her intended parents, and fell in love with them! It was so fun being pregnant with my best friend. The best part was being their when she gave birth, and gave the most amazing gift to the kindest couple of a lovely baby girl!

Mike came to the hospital that evening after work, and met the parents. He saw their tears of joy, and was in awe of this gift Sara had given! Soon after that we started talking about how this is something we would like to do for another couple.

It was February of this year that I started thinking and praying about it more. I brought this to Mike's attention, and he started doing the same. In March he found out a good friend and mentor's wife was also a surrogate. This helped him get some of the questions he had answered about being the husband and support person for a surrogate. They even took us to dinner one night to share their journey with us. It was truly inspiring, and I will always be thankful for them.

 I talked to my mom to have her praying, and filled out an application with Rocky Mountain Surrogacy (RMS) to just find out if I qualified. I figured knowing I did or didn't would help with the next steps.

I did, so it was time to make some decisions about what we wanted from this journey. Michael and I decided that we would be giving this baby a year of our lives, but care about it forever. We wanted the parents of this baby to people we would never question giving a baby to, and people who held the same moral standards we do.

• Because we believe a baby is a human from the moment it is conceived (even if done in a lab) we would not be willing to terminate for any reason. 
• We wanted parents who wanted a baby so much that there was not genetic testing needed, because nothing would make them love this (these) baby(ies) less. 
• We wanted a married couple that has a strong relationship. Michael and I strongly believe that you have to love your spouse more than your kids to show your kids how to have good relationships. 
• And we wanted a couple that was Christian. Denomination didn't matter to us as much as knowing the baby(ies) would be raised to love Jesus. 

I felt like all of these things for me would make the gift so much easier to give in the end, and would give the intended parents and us more common ground to build a friendship on during the process. 

All of the surrogates that we know needed to meet multiple couples to find one that fit, so that is what I was prepared to do. 

Then on May 18th I received an email with our 1st "match" (Like E-harmony for surros RMS has a great questionnaire, so they can get Intended Parents that match the wants/ needs of the Surro and vice versa). I started tearing up while reading their bio, and knew they were the ones for us. I sent it to Mike who said the same thing, and then had RMS set up a time for us to meet over Skype. 

They were so wonderful to talk to, and all of my nerves just calmed as I could just tell these people would be my friends very soon!
Now that I have had the opportunity to get to know them I just know that the peace was from God, and these people are the reason I found myself wanting to be a surrogate!

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️

Congratulations TSgt Reece

This week I got the honor of watching my husband be recognized for his hard work and accomplishments in the U.S. Air Force.

1st he was awarded his 2nd Air Force Commendation Medal 

Then the kids got to "punch" on his new stripes!

After the ceremony we took his parents out to see his radar. 

 He is the amazing man that I love today thanks to the hard work and dedication of these 2 people!

The older kids were super proud of dad!

 James was mostly impressed with all the cool rocks ;)

I am so incredibly proud of him, and 

glad that I get to be the one by his side

 as he succeeds in a career that he loves. 

Thank you to everyone that helped Michael accomplish this goal!